As the fires raged in Los Angeles, I found myself crying in Duane's arms. The fear, uncertainty, and enormity of the moment felt overwhelming. Yet, in that embrace, I rediscovered solace, connection, and the strength to carry on.

During catastrophes like the Palisades and Altadena fires—or any period of intense stress—couples can find grounding and healing in each other's arms.

To navigate these trying times, take a moment to hold each other. Start by asking, "Can I hug you?" and allow yourselves to embrace, relax, and lean into one another. Hugs are not just gestures of comfort; they are a biological lifeline. A prolonged hug, lasting more than 20 seconds, releases a cascade of hormones, including serotonin, dopamine, and endorphins, that improve mood, reduce pain, and calm the body. In moments like these, connection becomes your greatest ally.

The Science Behind Hugging

When intense stress strikes, your body's fight-or-flight response takes over: heart rates accelerate, cortisol levels spike and anxiety builds. This natural reaction helps us respond to danger but can also lead to relational tension. Hugging, however, can interrupt this cycle and promote calm, connection, and healing.

Here's what happens when you embrace your partner:

• Oxytocin, often called the "love hormone," is released, generating feelings of safety, trust, and emotional closeness while reducing corisol levels.
• Endorphins, the body's natural painkillers, are released, helping to soothe physical discomfort and enhance emotional well-being.
• Serotonin and dopamine are neurotransmitters that regulate mood increase, which can combat anxiety and depression and improve overall happiness.

Even a simple 20-second hug can:

• Lower blood pressure and heart rate (Light et al., 2005).
• Deepen emotional bonds and reduce perceived stress (Coan et al., 2006)
• Regulate emotions during conflicts and crises (Ditzen et al., 2008).

Hugging is more than physical touch. They are a source of comfort and a reminder you're not alone.